She's Like Joe Pesci...

Although I watch a lot of films, I don't really watch that much television. Earlier this year, I went for about 4 months without a TV because my old one died and I just procrastinated in getting a new one. I've never owned a DVD player. When I want to watch a DVD, I slip it into one of my computers' CD/DVD drive. My new television has a connection port so I can run the computer monitor display through the TV. I'll have to try that sometime.

One reason I don't watch much television is because even though I have cable (now digital cable) and over 100 channels, I often can't find anything worth watching. During the summer, I'll watch Giants games. The rest of the year, I watch the History Channel or the Discovery Channel. I like watching shows about guns, Nazis, Bear Grylls and how thing are made with 70's soundtrack overlay. Sometimes, I'll watch VH1 if they are airing 100 Greatest (fill in the blank) from the 80's. How many times does Road House air every week? How long before they launch the Law and Order Channel?

There are shows that I don't watch but wish I would have when they debuted because now they're too far along for me to pick up the plotlines - Mad Men, Breaking Bad and Sons of Anarchy are three.

There are a few shows I watch.

I didn't blog about it but I was/am a huge fan of The Shield with Michael Chiklis. The cast was amazing so I won't single anyone out. The multi-season story arc about the flawed Vic Mackey was the best television I've seen. I wish it was still on the air.

The plots on Family Guy have been criticized as a series of non-sequiturs but they remind me of the old Zucker, Abrahams & Zucker films. They keep throwing gags against the wall and see what sticks. Also, because they are cartoon characters, they can get away with a lot more than live actors could. One of the recurring characters is a pedophile (maybe technically, he is a ephebophile) and they make jokes about minorities, gays and the handicapped among many other taboo subjects.

Actually, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia gets away with almost as much offensive humor as Family Guy. It's like Seinfeld 5 times as raunchy and moved to the South Side of Philly.

Rescue Me is uneven and I went for about two years without watching it. It became a cartoonish soap opera. The plot seemed to revolve around heaping tragedy on Denis Leary's Tommy Gavin (FDNY fireman) to the point of ridiculousness. Before the timeframe in the show, Gavin's best friend & cousin died on 9/11 (Gavin has recurring conversations with his ghost), Gavin's son died as a result of a drunk driving hit & run, his cop brother was shot in the line of duty (but not before he began an affair with Tommy's estranged wife), his father died of natural causes while sitting next to him at a baseball game, his mother died of natural causes (Gavin & his cop brother had a knock-down fight at the wake) and in last week's season finale, his uncle shoots him twice because he blames him for his wife's death (she was driving drunk). The humor of the show is what keeps me watching though.

Tommy's travails are wearing thin but every once in awhile, they come up with a sub-plot that shines. The past few episodes, Tommy has been seeing a cougar (Maura Tierney). Kelly (Tierney) had her claws into Tommy's cousin's son but Tommy stepped in and they've had a budding relationship since they both discovered the other lost a young child. I should mention that Tommy is having sexual relations with his estranged wife (Janet) and his cousin's widow (Sheila). The two of them decide they need to scare Kelly off because they prefer the devil they know to the devil they don't. That sets up one of the best scenes I've watched on television in a long time. Janet & Sheila show up at Kelly's place (actually it's temporary because her actual home burned down). After some initial maneuvering and posturing, Sheila lays it out that Tommy will only cause Kelly heartbreak and pain. Paraphrasing -

Kelly: Tommy held me.
(Look of shock on Janet and Sheila's faces)
Janet: Did you say 'held' or 'head?'
Kelly: Held.
Sheila: You mean like 'held you down?'
Kelly: No, held like embraced and comforted.
Sheila: Tommy doesn't do holding.
Kelly: Well, he held me. Now I'll have to ask you to leave. You can show yourselves out.
(Kelly gets up to go to the kitchen)
Sheila: I'm sorry about your loss.
Kelly: What?
Sheila: Your baby that died. Janet lost a son and I had a miscarriage. I guess it's something we have in common.

Later, Janet & Sheila have a fight on the street outside Kelly's brownstone. Kelly witnesses this and later (in a conversation with Tommy) gets off this all-time zinger - "The little one [Sheila], she's like Joe Pesci with tits."

Lately, I've been watching The Closer on Saturday mornings. It's time slot coincides with the time I typically do my laundry. It's not bad; Kyra Sedgewick's faux Southern accent is grating but that probably on purpose.

I try to get to the gym on Saturday afternoons. The stationary bikes have a TV built in and I frequently watch Iron Chef because it coincides with my typical workout time. Jeffrey Steingarten can be downright bitchy with his comments. He's like Joan Crawford without tits...

If memory serves me corectly...about 10 years ago, I used to watch the original Iron Chef in Japanese with subtitles. I much preferred that show with its wacky subtitles and reverential tones such as "The Delacroix of French Cuisne" or "The Mistress of Salt." I also liked the regal theme music (originally from the movie Back Draft).

Sometimes, I'll watch an episode of The Simpsons or House if I'm flipping channels. I liked Bill Shatner on Boston Legal too.

Music in the Time of Cholera

With sincerest apologies to Gabriel Garcia Marquez...

I've been busy with other activities but I engaged in two that would make great movies (not porn either).

I read a book called The Blue Death: Disease, Disaster, and the Water We Drink by Dr. Robert B. Morris. It is the story of civilization's water supply since the early 19th century. I have heard the story of the water pump handle but this book puts more detail on the man and the incident. For those not familiar with the story, Dr. John Snow (a pioneering epidemiologist) was convinced a specific well was the source of contaminated water that was causing cholera in London. He had the pump handle removed and the cholera stopped. That's simplified and dramatized but the story of cholera and how Dr. Snow and others tried to stop it is fascinating. That's the best part of The Blue Death although Morris includes other page-turning anecdotes that are nearly as fascinating. Morris starts with cholera's terror and leads us to present day terrorist threats. Although non-fiction, I think the book could be adapted for the screen.

I also saw the musical The Drowsy Chaperone at the Orpheum Theater in San Francisco. Billed as "a musical within a comedy", I thought for sure that this was some faux revival from the 1980's but was surprised to discover it debuted at the Toronto Fringe Festival in 2001.

As long as I mentioned it, let me plug the San Francisco Fringe Festival that runs September 3 to 14 at the Exit Theater. The Exit Theater is not a single venue but multiple, small venues in the Tenderloin. Fringe Fest is a festival of short plays produced with minimalist staging.

Back to The Drowsy Chaperone - this sweet natured musical is a lampoon of the musicals of the 1920's (think Gershwin or Cole Porter). A man (with decidedly effeminate mannerisms) is sitting at home alone and pulls out a vinyl record of The Drowsy Chaperone (a fictitious musical from 1928). The music and staging from the The Drowsy Chaperone proceeds to play out in his living room as he spouts expository dialogue about the actors in the 1928 production. The plot is secondary (like a porn movie as our guide likens it) but suffice to say it is the story of boy meet girls, boy loses girl & boy gets married. There is a lot of stuff layered on but this is as much an homage as a spoof.

I think the movie rights for this musical must have been optioned given the current revival of big screen musicals. Among my favorite numbers were Show Off, I Am Aldolpho and Message From A Nightingale. The latter song was from a different, fictitious musical recording from the era that had been put in the wrong album jacket. It must have been a least partially based on the musical version of The King and I except more racially offensive. It featured several of The Drowsy Chaperone actors in yellow face and wearing outrageous Chinese costumes. It is patently offensive by today's standards and could only be performed as satire but I'm not as PC as many (particularly in San Francisco) and think I could view a similar musical as an interesting and quaintly amusing artifact from the different era.

The Drowsy Chaperone plays until August 17 at the Orpheum.

I don't watch TV too much anymore but one of my favorite shows is ending this upcoming season. I am referring to The Shield. The Shield deserves many posts so I won't rehash (i.e. bore) why I am impressed with the show. It premieres on September 2. Last night, I watched a number of cast interviews on the internet.

Just to keep my hand in the pot, I saw Ride Lonesome at the PFA.

Ride Lonesome with Randolph Scott, Lee Van Cleef, Pernell Roberts, James Coburn and James Best; (1959).

That's right, Adam Cartwright and Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane in a movie together. Actually, both actors play against type if type is defined as their signature roles. The film has an existential feel to it as Randolph Scott is hyper-laconic as the bounty hunter that must face his prisoner's murdering brother (Van Cleef) and a pair of decent but realist outlaws (Roberts and Coburn). The plot is your basic chase movie but it delves into to the psychology of Scott, Van Cleef and to a lesser extent Best as the cowardly prisoner. At the center of these damaged men is the beautiful Karen Steele whom I hadn't seen before. She plays a recently widowed woman that is along for the ride and forms an emotional love triangle with Scott & Roberts. The film only runs 71 minutes and that includes a marauding Indian subplot that could have been trimmed down.

This film was quite a find for me. It certainly was influenced by High Noon and must have influenced Sergio Leone and Clint Eastwood.